Sleepwalking

Oh hai everybody.

Firstly, I wanted to say thank you so much to the lovely readers who have started following me recently. I hope you all enjoy your stay ^^

Anyway, today's post is going to be mainly text because I haven't done anything interesting over the past couple days due to work commitments.

So, I woke up this morning and felt really sick in the stomach, granted it was probably because I ate KFC for dinner last night but still - I feel awful right now. Generally speaking, I eat pretty clean but I won't deny that sometimes I fuel my body with junk, especially when it's THAT time of the month (ladies are you with me?) It's awful because all I want to do is cry while I eat EVERYTHING in my line of sight.

When I do feel sick after eating a bunch of junk, I usually shrug it off and accept that it is what it is and I continue feeling lousy for the entire day. It's sort of like when you have a raging night out and it results with you waking up on the toilet floor with an epic hangover & a foul taste in your mouth. You tell yourself "I'm never drinking again" but the next weekend rolls around & you're back on it - because that's the cost of eating/drinking shit right? Wrong. This time around I'm feeling more inspired than ever to never feel like this again. Maybe it's because I'm getting older & I'm becoming more conscious of what I put in my body, I'm not quite sure just yet.

The past couple months I've allowed my curiosity to take control and it's lead me to research various lifestyle changes and I have been blown away by the various options - paleo, raw, vegetarian, no sugar, Atkins, juicing, vegan and holy shit the list just keeps going on that I can't keep up with them all. There are so many options on what kind of lifestyle one can adopt.

I've decided that as of Monday (It's currently Wednesday) I'm going to cut out meat/dairy and adopt a high plant based diet (I hate that word because I'm not actually dieting) and see how I go. I'm going to slowly wean myself off food that I've grown up eating and not be so hard on myself if I slip up here & there because I know myself, I have a bad habit of messing something up & using that as ammo to stop myself from continuing and that usually leaves me feeling pretty lousy so to avoid that, I'm just going to see how I go and if I happen to keep going long term, then yay - GO ME.

My reasoning behind this is because I don't like how I feel after I eat large amounts of meat/dairy and I actually really enjoy eating vegetables and fruits. I can literally gorge and I never feel sick when I'm done. I also don't enjoy how I feel after I eat white rice and/or white bread because who enjoys feeling bloated? So I'm also going to cut out white carbs and focus more on brown/wild rice/pasta.

On top of all of this, I'm becoming more aware of how animals are actually treated within the meat and dairy industries. Learning and being educated about how they are tortured/killed in slaughter houses actually hurts my heart more than I thought it ever would and I've decided that I no longer want to be a part of it. I can't help but feel like a hypocrite when I express my love of all animals to people but then continue to take advantage of cows, chickens, sheep, ducks etc ..

Soooooo, let's see how I go hey?

Goddess

I recently had a comment left on one of my instagram pictures & it sort of annoyed me.

Granted, I'm probably just a bit irritable at the moment because "you know who" is coming back for another monthly visit.

Anyway, a follower left me a comment that said "Your life looks so perfect, why can't my life be this perfect. I would be much happier if I could do all the things you do." Don't get me wrong, that's the downside with running a blog as well as having a public social media platform - you open yourself up to people having a certain perception of who you are, as well what your life is like. I remember back when I blogged my daily adventures, religiously - a number of my followers would comment on how my life looked perfect and how they wished that they could have it as easy as I did because my photos showed "perfection". That's the thing though, a photo is real but it's just a small insight into someones actual reality.

I guess that's the bad thing, as humans we automatically assume that the person with the biggest smile means that they are the happiest when in fact they might be the saddest. I guess that's the same when it comes to following someone via social media. We assume based on what they show.

In all fairness though, it's hard not to.

I want readers of this blog to know in advance, I am far from perfect, my life itself is far from perfect.To be honest, majority of my time is spent at work because I work Monday to Friday - full time. My weekends involve a lot of catching up with cleaning and once all those tedious chores are done, then I have the luxury of spending time with my girlfriend & our friends.

Outside of all that, it's some what boring.

I'm sorry if you've come to read my usual posts where I tell you what I've been doing. This post is some what of a downer and it's because I've been feeling down. This is due to the fact that I was forced to close a lot of doors on people that I thought would always be considered "friends". It doesn't do anyone any good to dwell on the past, I know that, but the wounds are still fresh and I'm only starting to believe that it's ok to no longer have these people in my life. The hardest one to let go of though is was my best friend. I think I'll mourn the loss of her for a very long time.

As per usual, all the photos from the past week/weekend are below. Enjoy my loves.